THE SECRET* GROAD SERIES
A special message from our CEO:
Dear valuable customers,
Eighty-four years ago, Secret Groad was founded under a single guiding principle: Secrecy. And a second single guiding principle: Groad.
It goes without saying that these twin single guiding principles have grown and intertwined as two vines climbing a pole, and that they continue to guide us through these trying times. As the clip art above makes clear, we will always value sending love letters. We believe in swooshy stars. We write things with pens. And, sometimes, we speak in ellipses.
In these most trying of times, we want to reassure you that Secret Groad is taking every measure available to us to prevent the spread of COVID-19, and to protect both our valuable employees and our somewhat less valuable customers. Primarily, we are not riding in groups, because we are not idiots.
If you must groad, groad alone.
Alf the dog
CEO, Secret Groad Limited
Secret Groad FAQs:
How does this work
It's pretty simple. You get some friends — this is your team. You come up with a team name. This is the extent of the pre-registration process.
On Friday we'll post three to five groadpoints here (and send them out in an email, sign up above). Look at them. Look at maps. Look at the Strava heat map. You and your team need to get to all those groadpoints, in any order, and then back to the start. First team back wins. Make a route.
Show up at the right time and place, put your team name on the list.
Go for a ride.
What bike should I ride?
Last year we had people on 23mm road tires and people on mountain bikes. You do you, boo. Remember, you make your own route.
How do we know we found the right groadpoint spot?
You will know. There will be a thing. Or there might not be. Wing it.
How will everyone else know we got to the right spot?
One team member will take a short video of another team member doing 10 pushups at each waypoint. Upload this video to Instagram at the finish. Hashtag it #Groad so we can find it.
There is no 'I' in Team. But if you must ride alone, you still have to get video of yourself doing pushups.
What about results?
When you get back to the finish, you will write your team name on the results sheet. The order in which names are written is the finish order. Voilá.
Will there be beer and maybe pizza at the end?
Yes and maybe
Will there be coffee at the beginning?
See you there.